(Pizza) Slices of Life
by sylph-feather
Summary: Many glances into the ordinary lives of the Titans.
1. Height

Cyborg clapped his hands together, metal clanging with metal to create a truly thunderous and attention grabbing sound. Truthfully, it was unnecessary; all the Titans were gathered in the living area. He could've just as easily barked their names over the din of general teenage ruckus, but Cyborg quite enjoyed dramatics.

"Beast Boy and I have made a bet," he began, eyes closed assuredly. Everyone else's groans did not deter him; he was only egged on by the singular positive response in the green boy.

Even Starfire knew by now that if Beast Boy and Cyborg concocted any sort of bet, it was _bad news_.

"We need to know all your heights!" Beast Boy squaked joyously.

"We want to know how tall everyone is," Cyborg stated calmly.

"Beast Boy's the shortest, you're the tallest. Done," Raven growled, snapping open the novel once more.

"Puberty could change that!" Beast Boy murmured defensively, motioning obscene heights with his hands.

"We know Starfire's taller than me, it's pretty obvious," Robin also chipped in, preparing to put headphones back in and pull a Raven in drowning out the conversation.

"Well yeah! You're tiny!" Beast Boy laughed.

"Look who's talking," Raven muttered.

"Puberty!" Beast Boy yelled, voice cracking. Robin's mask narrowed a bit.

"Fine. We really just wanted to know if you or Raven was taller. It's kinda' hard to tell," Cyborg conceded. "We just wanted to not… focus on that. Because you guys wouldn't agree."

"Well, you guessed right," Raven nodded, eyes tracing words on the page.

"Pleaaaaase," Beast Boy keened.

"You know they won't shut up until we do it," Robin sighed.

Raven placed her feet down from levitating and gave an even deeper sigh. With clear displeasure, she moved over to Robin.

"No floaty tricks," Beast Boy said, wiggling his fingers and moving to examine the pair.

"Huh," Cybarg grunted looking down at the two back-to-back heroes. "They're _exactly_ the same, even my scanners say as much," he said, finger rubbing his chin, patting down Robin's hair just to be sure.

"That's kinda impress- WAIT!"

Everyone flinched at Beast Boy's loud screech. The green child pointed an accusatory finger at Robin's boots.

"Those would interfere!" he shrieked, as though Robin betrayed them all by forgetting to remove them.

Robin shrugged and shucked the boots off, standing in socks.

"Raven is taller," Cyborg said, now looking at the decent gap between the pair.

"You're the second shortest!" Beast Boy announced to Robin as though the Boy Wonder was winning an award.

"You're the _first_ shortest," Raven shot back. She still couldn't help but grin a little at the prospect of looking down at their leader while on the ground, though.

"Puberty," Beast Boy defended again, hands on his hips. "And _you've_ already hit yours, haven't you Rob?"

"Doomed to be short," Cyborg lamented, metal hand patting Robin's head in a mockery of sorrow. Robin snorted, not unlike a tiny bull.

"If I was tall, would I be able to do _this_?" and with that, Robin was using Cyborg's hand to pull him into leverage for a flip, which he kicked hard off his metallic back to fling further and flip into the air at a greater height. Robin landed with a little flourish and a smirk at the slack-jawed pair that challenged heights to begin with.

"Gymnasts are better short. It runs in the family," Robin said, giving a little mock bow.

"Does that mean _I'll_ be good at gymnastics?" Beast Boy wondered, stars practically appearing in his eyes.

"I've been doing it all my life," Robin reminded, at the same time Raven interrupted with a reminder of her own: " _puberty_."


	2. Cursing (P1)

**Summary:** Cursing is inevitable in a place filled with teenagers, especially since many of them seem to be swear-repressed.

 **Rating:** I guess M… PG-13… or something? But only because it's swearing. There's nothing else.

When Cyborg barked out a loud explicative when part of the T-Car landed directly on his foot, he did not expect much to come of it.

He did not at all expect for Robin, polishing his motorcycle to jump like he'd been shot and give Cyborg a wide eyed gaze that clearly said _you're in trouble_. The boy wonder glanced around as though expecting a scolding to come from thin air.

"What? Never heard it before?" Cyborg drawled mockingly, before popping off another "fuck" much to Robin's awe.

It seemed to his Robin all at once that nobody would chide Cyborg for the action, and a devilish grin split across his face. Cyborg suddenly realized what he had opened up.

"Wait, Robin-" but it was blocked out by a torrent of curse words.

Robin jumped on the R-Cycle and threw up his middle fingers to the sky and screeched "fuck you Batman! You can't fucking stop me now!"

Cyborg ran his hand down his face at the energized swearing teen when yet another of that ilk came hovering down the stairs to the garage.

"Is this a game?" Starfire asked, eyes bright green and inquisitive as Robin injected every explicative he could into nonsensical phrases.

Not waiting for a reply, she began doing the same, laughing joyously in stark contrast to Robin's beastial screams of freedom.

Starfire was most creative in her uses, but Robin seemed to outdo her in terms of sheer passion behind the words.

Cyborg decided that running a hand down his face was not enough, and shifted to cupping it mournfully as he was surrounded by a flood of explicatives.

"Cyborg, why do you not join us?" Star laughed, and Robin finally calmed. He flushed a bit, coming down from the euphoria of many restrained curse words worming their way out.

"Those were curse words, Star," Cy explained with a sigh, and the alien gasped.

"Have I done the hex on you? Oh no!"

"Not like that," Robin instantly said, calming her. "Just uh, bad words."

"Passionate words," Cyborg chipped in.

"I do not understand."

"They're only used when you get… very mad. Or sometimes happy. They're special," Robin explained poorly.

"I believe we Tamaraneans have words like that. They often are in reference of…" Starfire trailed off, then looked at the pair with realization and finished quickly, "it does not translate."

"Uh yeah. So, don't use them around kids and stuff," Cyborg said, feeling too much like a mother hen for his liking.

"I will not, friend Cyborg!" Starfire called, dutifully.

"Me neither. That's enough swearing to last me a lifetime," Robin laughed.

"Swear, what did you swear? Some sort of promise?" Star turned to the boy.

Cyborg just marched up the stairs to the sounds of an explanation with a light chuckle.


	3. Cursing (P2)

**Summary:** Batman's punishment is not immediate, but it comes eventually.

 **Rating:** K

It's a while before the Titans begin teaming up with the Justice League. The Titans are more than eager to do so, but the Justice League seems to believe the threats the Titans deal with are beneath them, much to the frustration of the Titans.

Of course, when the Titans let slip that they defeated one of the most powerful demons in the multiverse and established a truly astounding network of next generational heroes, the League changes their tune and more effort is made to keep in contact and get help from one another.

It takes even _longer_ for Robin to work pleasurably with Batman, though still the tension lays thickly between them in the downtime.

It is during the rare League-Titans joint mission that Starfire lets loose a powerful and loud swear when struck down, before charging at the villains with mighty starbolts ablaze.

Everything else seems to freeze.

Superman looks highly offended, Green Arrow looks like he might start cheering, and Batman remains as stone faced as ever. Everyone else is varying degrees of surprised or have faces that read clear as day: _ugh, teenagers._

"Who taught that girl to swear?" Flash jokes, vibrating a hand through a robot and efficiently destroying it. It's as though someone hit the unpause button with that comment, and everything speeds up again.

"It was Robin!" Starfire answers joyously, despite the fact that Robin is making large slashing motions to indicate a distressed _don't_ to the Tamaranean.

Green Arrow explodes a couple 'bots with a dangerous arrow before slinging over. He gives Robin a high five.

A shadow drops over the two.

Batman glares down, an ominous figure that makes even Oliver quail under his gaze. The Green Arrow gives a sympathetic pat to Robin and shoots more robots.

"We should focus on battling," Robin says shakily. Usually, the bat glare is ineffective… but Bruce seemed to have amped that glare up to eleven, and even Robin is not immune to such a potent stare.

Over the din of the battle, Cyborg catches the glare, and then almost immediately divulges the story behind the incident. Robin can feel Batman's glare on him the entire fight.

 _Oh boy._

 **Short & sweet but a good end to that saga...! Poor Rob. **

**By the way, I do take prompts for this if one of y'all has a suggestion! It's not required, though. I wrote like, 50 ideas for oneshots, so...!**


	4. Tech

**Summary:** Cyborg has _got_ to get his hands on that sweet Batman tech. Beast Boy, on the other hand, should not be allowed to be anywhere near it.

 **Rating:** K

After the defeat of the Gordanians, the freshly minted team indulges in some victory pizza.

Needless to say, it's a little awkward, considering their mash of personalities and lack of knowledge about one another.

As soon as the delicious grease fest is finished, Cyborg turns to Robin, and Robin heaves a great exasperated sigh internally- Cyborg's eyes shine with the same doting admiration as Beast Boy.

"Robin, you _have_ to show me some of that sweet Batman tech," Cyborg pleads, almost keening.

Robin merely blinks- that is _not_ what he was expecting. He may operate largely in the shadows, but interactions with stupidly adoring fans had never gone this way. For a moment, the boy short circuits before releasing a sigh of great relief.

Robin reaches into his stache to pull out an arsenal of birdarangs, as well as several assortments of bombs (some of which are _also_ birdarangs). Cyborg looks like he is about to drool as he runs his fingers along the gadgets, Beast Boy also gaping with stars in his eyes as he gently picks up a birdarang with orange edges.

"Wait!" Robin barks, but it is too late; Beast Boy presses the tip of the weapon. Robin snatches it out of his hand and launches it as far as possible- and it doesn't get far before it blows up.

The table next to theirs doesn't exist anymore.

The clerk looks a _bit_ unhappy.

With utmost care, Cyborg places the bomb and birdarang he was holding back on the table, admiration and excitement replaced by fear. Robin sheepishly loads them back into his belt.

"Why don't we look at the R-cycle instead?"

Cyborg and Beast Boy nod, excitement restored. Starfire merely glances in confusion over at Raven, who runs her hand over her face.

A moment later the endeavor proves futile- Beast Boy manages to find a way to blow things up with the motorcycle, anyways. Cyborg had a great joy in admiring the thing before Beast Boy utilized its numerous weapons, though.


	5. Group Chat

**Summary:** Robin makes a group chat with every single Titan. It almost immediately descends into chaos.

 **Rating:** G/K, except for the occasional swear

 **Notes:** I once swore I'd never write a fic in script format because I hated nearly everything I read- they were all lazy and bad. Clearly I broke that oath, but hopefully it provides entertainment. This is easily my favorite one shot so far.

 **Robin:** Hello, Titans! Using your communicators, I've set up a group chat. It would be a good idea to plan out meetings and announce need of assistance to everyone through this. Bumblebee and I are moderators, but I trust that won't be needed!

 **Beast Boy:** whoa dude whats w/ the colrs

 **Speedy:** aren't you guys in the same tower? Why couldn't you have asked him irl?

 **Beast Boy:** 2 lazy lol

 **Robin:** the colors are by group; Titans East is dark blue, we're light blue, and the Honorary Titans are yellow.

 **Starfire:** I love this color! It is most pretty! Hello friends! Is it not most fascinating and enchanting that we may speak with one another in this manner of writing?

 **Wildebeest:** dsfheqdsllpo

 **Pantha:** He's trying to say hello, but he has a bit of a hard time typing.

 **Starfire:** hello friend Wildebeest! How nice it is to talk to you! I have heard many of the stories about you!

 **Jinx:** I can't wait 'til this descends into chaos. I have a good selection of memes to start us off~

 **Robin:** you know what actually I'm making a general chat separate from super hero chats and muting it immediately.

 **Robin:** I went to sleep and came back to hundreds of messages. Guys.

 **Beast Boy:** lol we're teenagers dude what were u expecting

 **Jinx:** I told you it would descend, and that I would relish in it.

 **Speedy:** there's no way you're stronger than me. I have many very powerful arrows. How many animals can fall to arrows? Basically all of them.

 **Beast Boy:** how many archers have fallen to animals? Lets fight irl & prove it

 **Speedy:** name a time and a place

 **Robin:** I can't believe this.

 **Aqualad:** I bet on Beast Boy.

 **Speedy:** :O!

 **Robin:** If we're indulging them… I'll go with Speedy. Sorry, BB.

 **Speedy:** Thx robin. More trust in me than my own teammate

 **Beast Boy:** robin 2day u betrayed me worse than u did w/ redx

 **Speedy:** so we're actually gonna fight irl or?

 **Beast Boy:** why not, sure

 **Robin:** where did I go so wrong

 **Cyborg:** HEY! _everyone_! I'll stream the fight live!

 **Wildebeest:** dffighvtc

 **Kole:** YES! FIGHT!  
 **Jinx:** the chaos… gives me nrg…

 **Robin:** please don't kill each other

 **Robin:** also cy I think the people in other timezones would appreciate not being 'ed

 **Cyborg:** oops. Sorry

 **Jinx:** killjoy

 **Cyborg:** the fight is up & runnin y'all! Tell me if the stream is weird.

 **Raven:** Just know that not _all_ of the original Titans agree with this.

 **Robin:** there's really no stopping them at this point

 **Starfire:** Oh my! That was quite the hit that Beast Boy just took!

 **Robin:** Explosives do that to _any_ animal.

 **Jinx:** press f to pay respects

 **Wildebeest:** fffdf

 **Kid Flash:** f

 **Aqualad:** f

 **Herald:** f

 **Hot Shot:** f

 **Starfire:** why is everyone saying the f? Does it mean the curse word? The "Fuck?"

 **Jinx:** it's a meme, dear

 **Starfire:** what is this meme which you speak of?

 **Jinx:** another innocent soul to corrupt…

 **Jinx:** hewwo

 **Kid Flash:** uwu

 **Beast Boy:** [owo ]

 **Pantha:** nya

 **Starfire:** h… hewwo, friends? Am I doing it correctly?

 **Robin:** [then ]

 **Robin:** I made new rules for this chat because apparently you guys are meme loving chaotic fools.

 **Jinx:** tru that

 **Beast Boy:** r u rlly any different dude

 **Starfire:** Yes! Friend Robin participates in the joking and the chaos as much as any one of us!

 **Robin:** this is kind of undermining everything

 **Robin** : Anyways, here:

1\. don't everyone unless it's an actual crime. I didn't think this would need to be a rule

2\. if you do fight irl please don't destroy too much and don't kill anyone including each other

3\. Beast Boy is not allowed to make puns _(edited)_

 **Beast Boy:** my puns are not that bad 3:

 **Robin:** as a pun master I think that I have the authority to say they are

 **Jinx:** don't think we didn't see that typo, Robin

 **Jinx:** yuou

 **Wildebeest:** yyyuuou

 **Kid Flash:** yuou

 **Beast Boy:** yuou

 **Hot Shot:** YUOU

 **Bumblebee:** press f to pay respects

 **Beast Boy:** f

 **Hot Shot:** f

 **Speedy:** f.

 **Raven:** You will be missed, Robin

 **Jinx:** how should we tell batman that robin was brutally murdered

 **Beast Boy:** we should put yuou on his grave

 **Flash:** hey babe hows it going

 **Jinx:** not bad, wbu?

 **Kid Flash:** also not bad. we should meet up soon, i miss ya a lot. we need 2 do our usual stuff, u kno? cuddle n shit

 **Jinx:** yeah :)

 **Beast Boy:** get a room

 **Starfire:** aw, is it not the adorable?

 **Kid Flash:** crap i thought this was dms

 **Jinx:** this is embarrassing

 **Beast Boy:** press f to pay respects

 **Kid Flash:** sup guys

 **Robin:** Not much man, you?

 **Kid Flash:** just hangin w/ Flash & the League

 **Kid Flash:** oh shit

 **Beast Boy:** ?

 **Kid Flash:** rob, batman says hi

 **Robin:** tell him to piss off

 **Robin:** actually please don't

 **Kid Flash:** rob he's reading the chat over my shoulder

 **Kid Flash:** ROB

 **Robin:** I'm so screwed

 **Kid Flash:** I don't think I need to explain what this intensity of The Glare looks like

 **Beast Boy:** "The Glare" ?

 **Robin:** batman if you're still reading this please leave me alone

 **Kid Flash** : ye the glare he does. Sometimes he scares criminals into submission with it

 **Robin:** as a member of the batfamily I'm immune

 **Kid Flash:** batman says that even he doubts you're immune to this intensity

 **Robin:** batman would never say anything while glaring…

 **Beast Boy:** oH SHIT FAM

 **Kid Flash:** lol for a "genius detective" raised by batman you sure are gullible, i thought u'd question it out sooner

 **Beast Boy:** [illusion ]

 **Kid Flash:** please make my grave beautiful, this was 100% worth it

 **Bumblebee:** Robin isn't it 3AM in your timezone? Why are you still awake?

 **Robin:** I was raised by Batman.

 **Bumblebee:** that's kind of badass actually

 **Robin:** I don't need sleep

 **Bumblebee:** I think that's debatable

 **Jinx:** robin thats a goddamn mood

 **Starfire:** Look friends! It is a smile :)

 **Starfire:** Look, now it has gained two faces :):

 **Starfire:** Maybe one is a mask to disguise its true feelings. Maybe it has worn the mask too long and now it does not know whether it is happy or sad, so it looks like both.

 **Beast Boy:** geez star that got deep

 **Starfire:** :)

 **Beast Boy:** excuse u i'm pretty fast. I can b a cheetah

 **Kid Flash:** listen beast boy, sorry but i can run faster than sound so…

 **Kid Flash:** you kind of suck

 **Beast Boy** : screw u

 **Beast Boy:** say that to my face

 **Beast Boy:** WHOA GUYS. HE ACTUALLY CAME AND SAID IT. TO MY FACE

 **Beast Boy:** i hate superspeed

 **Kid Flash:** ;)

 **Beast Boy:** callout post for robin, betrayed us by becoming a radical villain

 **Aqualad:** callout post for Speedy. Cares too much about his hair

 **Robin:** callout post for kid flash, once abandoned me in another country to try to get with a girl (and miserably failed)

 **Starfire:** callout post for Robin, he is too sweet and kind, and his hair is beautiful

 **Starfire:** friends, did I do that correctly?

 **Cyborg:** you could never do anything wrong, star

 **Robin:** callout post for Starfire, shoots amazing starbolts and has even better hair than me

 **Jinx:** this is the weirdest but cutest flirting i've ever seen

 **Jinx:** and that's saying something, considering i'm w/ kid flash

 **Queen Bee:** hey everyone check your nicknames

 **Hot Robot:** ?

 **Hot Robot:** BEE, NO

 **Green Furry:** im screenshotting this for eternity

 **Purest of Stars:** I do not understand how I am pure, please explain? My mineral content is as sullied as anyone else?

 **Robin:** How'd crime fighting go today, guys?

 **Kid Flash:** flash & i caught cap cold. stupid parka man

 **Beast Boy:** he looks horrible in those glasses and coat

 **Kid Flash:** ye lol

 **Kid Flash:** now im just chillin w/ the league

 **Kid Flash:** you'll b happy to know that the other robins are doing well

 **Robin:** that's good! I keep in contact with them but us bats seem to be prone to lying about how we're doing

 **Kid Flash:** uh speaking of lying

 **Kid Flash:** remember when i pranked u and said batman was watching

 **Kid Flash:** he's looking at me rn like… like he knows

 **Robin:** I'm not falling for that again.

 **Kid Flash:** pls i'm not kidding

 **Kid Flash:** [HES LOOKING ]

 **Beast Boy:** wow that glare is intense. Scary, dudes

 **Robin:** HE KNOWS. HE CAN SEE, SOMEHOW.

 **Robin:** _everyone_ SCATTER


	6. Pizza

**Summary:** Raven has pizza with the Titans for the first time.

 **Rating:** K/G

 **Notes:** This lovely lil' prompt was suggested by Pamela on ao3!

 _umm i've always had this headcanon that raven didn't know what pizza was until she met the titans. i always figured there was no pizza on azarath. can you do a chapter of her first time eating pizza with the team? =D_

Thanks for it and the compliments!

Anyone is free to suggest other prompts and headcanons, too. Even aus, man!

Hopefully I channeled the more anxious Raven that we see in Go.

Raven hadn't had pizza before she met the Titans. It wasn't like the interdimensional plane of Azarath had access to tomatoes.

Even after she eventually found herself on earth, Raven had no urge to try the food. She'd rather not eat something that had a visible layer of grease on it.

So yeah, Raven steered clear of pizza, despite it seemingly being the typical, go-to food of teens.

She didn't exactly have any friends to go eat it with, either. Pizza usually seemed to be enjoyed in the company of others, and well… Raven wasn't exactly with others, was she?

Except… now she was! She had _friends!_

Or they seemed to think of her that way, at least?

Was that just wishful thinking?

The man with the blue circuitry woven in his flesh that had been so kind to her nudged her gently with his metal casing and gave a warm smile. In his hands was an offering- a grease laden slice of cheesy pizza.

Raven chomped down, relishing in the cheesiness and the conversation that flowed around her, and smiled just a little. It felt… nice. Like friendship, like fitting in, like the start of something great.

Maybe pizza wasn't so bad.


	7. Reports

**Summary:** The Justice League starts to hear word of the Teen Titans.

 **Rating:** K/G

 **Notes:** Unfortunately, a general grasp on the DCU is probably needed to enjoy this one, since it's from the League's point of view. Probably not way-in depth knowledge, but still.

Now, the Justice League couldn't keep its eye on every up and coming hero group, and it was natural that some got shoved to the back burner. That wasn't to say that the League didn't have files and knowledge on them, but there were only so many heroes one could keep track of whilst staying sane, so the ones who were further away, interacted less, and dealt with lesser threats were simply not thought of often.

The Teen Titans were somewhat of a special case- Batman had essentially restricted most info about them, clearly still sore about his little bird flying the coop. The League only heard what the bat deemed necessary and the things that came through the news filter- which actually was surprisingly little.

See, in a world that seems to get invaded by aliens every other day, a few teens fighting crime in California gets a little blocked out. It could be found by a simple search, but… none of them seemed to remember at convenient times, and ultimately they were proud of Robin, but most didn't know the boy that well.

Needless to say, when reports started coming in about them, they were surprised.

When the group started, the League heard of their defeat of the Gordanians, due to the need to track all interstellar activity, and then it was simply radio silence.

The Titans took a while to assemble themselves, with Robin assumedly teaching the greens how to be true heroes. Even after that, Jump City was a relatively normal city, with D-list villains milling about that the team easily swept up.

"There are reports of a, er, toddler-like rock alien accompanied by a green dog, as well as time travel coming from Jump City. Is that correct, Batman?"

"Yes."

"I guess it's good to know Robin still updates important files, eh Batman?" Flash grinned.

"People are saying there was a class five reality altering event in Jump City," Green Arrow said lightly, sauntering up to the bat.

"Mm," was the only answer Batman provided.

"So the Titans managed to deal with it?" Green Arrow whistled. "Your bird's sure grown."

Next was the earthquake warnings and the loom of Deathstroke.

It was over before the League had gotten a grip on the situation, and it was quite a fight; they were truly impressed.

Batman merely stewed.

"There were reports of interplanetary beings the same consistency as tofu, using cows to power their spaceships. It says it's been dealt with. Flash, is this a joke?" Black Canary hissed.

"Not from me."

"The Titans sent it," Batman said in a growl.

"Those teens sure have interesting ways of pranking us," the Flash sighed.

"It wasn't a prank."

"You sure?"

"There's a dragon on Titans Tower," Zatara said dumbly, clearly disturbed by the camera feed.

"It's being dealt with," Batman snarled, the pair watching as Raven's magic tugged the beast back into the pages.

Zatara merely squinted at the dark power, rushing to confront his books about its strange familiarity.

"Reports of a cursed pie and request for a magical containment system… Batman, are you _sure_ they're not joking with us?"

Robin didn't go by his normal protocol of giving reports quietly with only Batman to know about it. Instead, he took a Zeta beam directly to the Watchtower, and practically soaked up their surprised looks.

He appeared to be quite worn, and even smelled of something burning, but he was smiling despite the singed look about him.

When Robin tiredly walked over to Batman and enveloped him in a hug, Flash guffawed at the Bat's evidence surprise.

It lasted only a moment before Robin sucked in a breath, and withdrew himself, emotions becoming hazy once more. Without even saying a word, the boy was taking a Zeta beam once more.

Zatara burst in.

"League! According to my readings, there was a world ending event mere minutes ago! We must locate the ones who stopped it to gain their aid and alliance for the future, for they were truly powerful."

Everyone stared at the Zeta beam tube.


	8. Ghost

**Summary: The team deals with the aftermath of the hallucinations of Slade.**

 **Rating: K/G**

 **Notes: Takes place right after my fav ep, Haunted. Annnnngst. (Also sorry for abandoning this for a while, my phone died and took all my ideas with it, and it really killed my motivation).**

There's some sort of anxious itch under his skin, the itch of a battle unwon, an enemy that got away.

 _There was no enemy,_ Robin pleads with himself, a desperate gambit for the calm his body so desperate needs after going through imagined pain and real stress.

It doesn't work.

He sits on the couch, uncomfortably aware of the other Titan's faux casualness, feeling their attempt at subtle glances to check his wellbeing crawl over his skin. He is keyed up to the max, and this fragile treatment, the _watching_ , isn't helping in the least. All Robin wants to do is crawl off into his room and sleep but— he entered his room before, only to see so many pictures of the one eyed menace watching from every corner, newspapers glued to his walls. Right then and there he nearly loses it.

But Batman didn't raise someone who broke down under stress; the Batfamily is nothing without repression and compartmentalization. Robin learned it from the best.

So here he is, feeling claustrophobic under their gazes and sitting as stiff as a board on the couch. Only Raven is not continuously looking at him with those pitying eyes that make his skin crawl, and he is thankful for that.

The urge to crawl off into a hole rises once more, and this time he represses it with an internal snap at himself— he's been quite the grade A douche to his team. He owes them this, even if it seems to turn the adrenaline pumping through his veins to acid.

"Robin, are you upset?" Starfire interrupts his thoughts gently.

Robin realizes he has to untangle a glare from his face from the unpleasant thoughts, and he does so quickly before giving a quick shake of the head.

Speaking feels hard, words carrying an energy that Robin's adrenaline does not gift him.

Even innocent Star does not believe Robin, but with the awkward silence broken she continues on with even more softness.

"Robin, was it the gas that made you act as you did in the forest? To our friends? Was it that which made you…" she trails off, giving a small _eep_ , as though she's rambled too much. The hope shining in her eyes shows that she merely wants affirmation, but Robin… Robin simply stares into space, caught on the trailing end of the sentence.

 _What follows? Betray us? Hurt you?_

His thoughts are scattered, yet converge on a scribble of negativity surrounding him, adding fuel to his stress.

He blinks slowly. Puts it in a box, shunts it away. Deep breath, deep breath, swallow.

Words are still too hard, and the pause continues uncomfortably. He chokes, a bird having its neck wrung by simple words.

The truth is— no. It was him. They wouldn't believe him, and Robin panicked and lashed out; it was practically a Batfamily specialty by this point. Every one of them is fixed to the mission, unhealthily so, and things start going wrong if anyone gets in the way. No matter who that anyone is.

Star would not like that answer. The team would not like that answer.

So he lies, gives a simple nod.

Starfire is assured wholly, and her hug is vice like. The touch makes him feel like snakes have found their way into his gut. The rest of the team seems to accept the blatant lie out of optimism, though Raven's deep gaze seems to penetrate his very soul.


	9. Birdbrains

**Summary: Mumbo Jumbo turns Robin into his namesake.** **Or does he?**

 **Rating: K/G**

 **Notes: We needed some pure crack after that angst. I don't foray into much crack, but this idea latched on and wouldn't let go. Also, this is how trapped birds act, based on unfortunate experience with a quail flying directly into my house and its consequent freakout.**

xXx

It started, as it usually started, with a villain trying to rob a bank. The typical proceedings ensued- the Titans appeared and exchanged witty dialogue with said villai, before Robin said their battle cry and sheer chaos ensued.

This was where things became slightly atypical- Mumbo Jumbo tended to cause a bit more chaos than the ordinary villain. Distraction, not destruction, was his forte. He was quite brilliant at it, judging by the fact he had the Titans dodging thrown roses amongst a sea of very, very angry white rabbits that flooded out of his hat, and that Mumbo had managed to get away from the bank quite a bit.

Star had gushed on their cuteness from the air while her teammates were chomped until some of the rabbits decided to pick up the roses and use them as javelins. Then she learned to hate the vicious animals as much as the others did, knowing the true evil intent behind the adorable faces.

To say they were ready to be done with the fight was quite the understatement.

Per the usual of Mumbo's fights, though, the distraction was eventually waded through (with much grumbling of rabies and several rabbit bite marks).

Mumbo Jumbo merely gave a nervous chuckle to see the severely angered teens that were glaring daggers at him, displaying their powers and weapons as a clear threat.

"Uh, that's all folks," he barked, whipping out his hat to attempt a quick getaway.

Robin tossed a birdarang with far more violence than necessary, pinning the thing against the wall of the building Mumbo was pressed against.

For a moment, Mumbo Jumbo looked as if he was going to come quietly- but then his gaze grew large, and he began looking between the hat and the Titans, formulating a plan.

At the exact moment Mumbo made his move, Robin caught on. With no more than a yell of warning from Robin, the pair dove for the thing.

A large explosion was heard, shaking the wall and trees. The Titans shielded themselves, and heard a quiet thunk.

There, in the shade of the tree above the explosion site, lay a small robin. The team blinked, blinked again.

"It's a robin," Cyborg stated the obvious, stepping over to the knocked out creature. At Star's clearly confused look, he explained, "it's a bird. Our Robin is named after it."

"It is… cute? But… where is friend Robin?"

They stared at the bird for a long time, mulling over the possibilities, before Cyborg just laughed and scooped it up.

"I didn't think Mumbo was that clever. I mean, last time, he turned him into a monkey rather than the obvious-"

xXx

Back at the tower, Raven simply frowned at the still-asleep bird, studying it. The bird was oddly positioned in a hospital bed, with a tiny IV and everything.

"Mumbo's magic shouldn't have affected anything outside his hat… not to this scale…"

"Stranger things have happened, I guess. Just, uh, look up spells to get him back, I guess? And the rest of us will care for the wounds, the explosion really hit him," Cyborg smiled.

Raven gives a final glance to the creature before dramatically whisking off to study ancient books of transformation.

xXx

Eventually, the bird does wake up— and it wakes up screaming, flying about the hospital room and tearing out its custom tiny IV. Cyborg is flapping around the room like an idiot attempting to mimic the bird, yelling commands like "ROBIN CALM DOWN MAN!" and "STOP POOPING ON THE FLOOR."

The robin does not listen to either, its wings beating the ceiling with audible, painful thumps, seemingly expelling everything in its body while doing so.

Eventually, it tires itself out and perches on the highest shelf away from the half robot. Its breathing is heavy, even for a bird.

Beast Boy walks in and studies the nervous Cyborg and clumps of feathers and bird droppings adorning the floor.

"He's got a bird brain!" he caws. Cyborg tips his head. "Duh! He's thinking like an animal, dude!"

"How do we talk to him, then?"

"We can't! Just give him some food and stuff, and leave him alone."

"He won't get out?"

"Dude, he's a dumb bird, not a master of escape. Just put some curtain over the window or something so he doesn't smash into it."

Just at that moment, Star walked in. "I have come with the food you have told me to order from the store!"

The bird shrieked again in fear at her loud tone.

"Ah! Is friend Robin pleased to see me?"

"No, he's not exactly… himself," Cy explained carefully.

"Mind of a bird!" Beast Boy says as though its some spooky horror movie. For added effect, he throws in a vulturous caw. The robin panics once again. For his part, Beast Boy looks apologetic for the bird that is erratically flying above their heads.

Star held the suetover her head in reverent offering, and as a protection from the bird droppings.

"Friend Robin," she starts, shaking the encaged suet a bit. The bird slows, interest a bit piqued. "Calm, my friend, you are safe," she says softly, carefully opening the wrapper and letting the scent of peanut butter waft up. The robin lands, and slowly begins pecking at it.

The Titans are interrupted by another person walking into the room.

"You guys would not _believe_ what I had to fight in Mumbo's hat this time. Where were you?" a scuffed up Robin huffs, brushing at a charred part of his uniform. He blinks, taking in the once again shrieking bird, and the reverent positions that the Titans had taken to keep the thing calm mere moments ago. He stares a long time before simply shaking his head and walking away.

No words are exchanged between the Titans, but the three simply open the window and let the poor bird resume its life that it was going about before the explosion knocked it from its tree.


	10. Pranks

**Summary** : Beast Boy is a self proclaimed top class prankster.

 **Rating** : G

xXx

Beast Boy would never say it to Cy's face, but of the team members he was undoubtedly the easiest to prank. Really, it wasn't an insult to intelligent or abilities— rather it was that Cyborg did normal human things, and reacted like a normal human person. The rest of the team… not so much.

So yes, Beast Boy set up an easy gaggle of pranks on Cy— all his effort would go towards frying the bigger fish. Why bother with elaborate set ups when he could just do a simple prank and garner the same reaction…?

And thus, Beast Boy wreaked havoc on Cyborg's machine shop.

The first order of business was to swap places of all the tools Cyborg possessed; a frustrating and hilarious thing he could do with ease.

After that was done, Beast Boy gave an honorary salute to the T-Car for its service, and then whipped out a can of green silly string with a devious grin.

xXx

After leaving a very awful silly string rendering of himself on the ground near Cyborg's vandalized car, Beast Boy set out to mission two: Starfire.

It… didn't go well.

First, Beast Boy offered the Tameranian a vanilla pudding cup for lunch— a pudding cup that he'd filled with mayonnaise.

Starfire took it gratefully, and just when he was going to feel bad about taking advantage of her ineptitude and enthusiasm at the shocked look at the first bite… she turned and beamed at him.

"It is just like the food from my home planet," Star gushed. "We achieved this by boiling and blending the stuffed innards of a Huktaskan— tell me, friend Beast Boy, how did you create such a dish?"

Beast Boy couldn't decide whether to face palm or just vomit, so he decided to give up on pranking Star. The girl couldn't take a _subtle_ and _artful_ prank, leaving the only option to be something cruder that stood a chance of wounding her feelings in a misunderstanding.

No matter. There were others.

xXx

Ah… if it was between the hardest two to prank… Raven and Robin were it. Raven… well, she wasn't particularly hard to pull one over on (especially in terms of simple crude "surprise" pranks), but she had a propensity to get a bit _explosive_ in surprise or rage. Robin, on the other hand, had kind of freakish reflexes, and could make himself overly well hidden when he wanted to— Beast Boy had been on lookout, but had not caught hide nor hair of him, and thus his next target was Raven. Setting up a prank whilst the pranked remained in an unknown location was a risk, one that Beast Boy was not yet desperate enough to take. So: Raven.

He'd considered sneaking into her room and swapping things around and putting his own junk in there— and then Beast Boy remembered the mirror incident while he stood on the precipice to that gloomy room, and he'd wisely reconsidered.

On top of that, as easy as Raven was to catch with a water balloon or other surprise-gotcha nonsense, Beast Boy would rather not be blown up. _So that left…? What did that leave…?_

An idea came to him while he stood at the edge of Raven's gothic room. Rather than touch any sort of objects likely to get him cursed, he simply made a beeline for the closet, throwing back the engraved doors and grabbing as many robes as he could.

Next, he threw them in with some lovely pink dye— something that could be washed out eventually, to avoid _complete_ murder, but still something guaranteed to get a response from her.

xXx

Beast Boy had yet to locate Robin, and the day was waning. On top of that he was currently hiding from Raven and Cyborg as a mite on the wall.

So he went for it; risked it all, all or nothing.

It was a stressful job to claim some simple supplies from his room while the prank patrol scouted the hallways for him. Thankfully, he made it— likely because the pair had slowed their search to do a meticulous sweep of the building, looking for any small creature he could've become.

Quietly, Beast Boy opened Robin's drawer to begin the first order of operation— taping up pictures of robins over any picture Rob had in his room. Next would come the sprinkling of bird seed about his room, with a couple of bird feeders and a fountain placed around for finishing touches.

Alas, Beast Boy's risk of invading Robin's room with Robin's location being unknown didn't pay off. The communicator stashed on his belt gave a deadly _zzt_ as Robin's voice delivered a message: "he's in my room."

Beast Boy spluttered, shocked. It was all he could do to stare at the traitorous thing in utter betrayal until he heard a faint _thump_ behind him.

There was Robin— who had just _dropped from the vent._

"Have you been waiting here _all day?_ " Beast Boy eked out, somewhere between shock and complete hysterical amusement at the thought.

Robin's face twisted into a frown— but he was saved from denial with lies by Cyborg and Raven bursting into the room to apprehend Beast Boy, who fled with a panicked squawk.

"You'll pay for this!" Raven growled, clutching a pink robe while her shadowy magic lashed about.

Cyborg snarled, "for the T-Car," and they were off on the chase, leaving Robin to stretch out from being folded in an air duct for so long.

xXx

 **hell i realize looking back that the formatting on ffn is all sorts of weird. Now that I'm writing for this again I'll go back and fix it soon(ish).**

 **happy april fools day or whatever ;3 I tried to emanate a bit of Robin's more trickstery YJ side that we didn't really see in TT**


	11. Spring Snow Showers

**Summary:** A snow day in spring is rather… unexpected.

 **Rating** : PG

xXx

"It's supposed to be spring!" Cyborg squawked angrily, making a show of kicking at an offending clump of snow and waving his hands around at the still-going snowstorm. He immediately shivered and burrowed into his large parka. "We had _plans!_ Why?!"

Robin gave a despondent shrug from inside his light coat. "Climate change."

"Wait, I thought this was caused by Mr. Freeze?" Star asked, tilting her head cutely, scarf shifting with it. "May I ask for the clarification?"

"Robin's just joking," Beast Boy responded, then looked down. "But I gotta agree with Cy on this one… it's pretty miserable." He gave a shudder for emphasis, mimicking Cyborg and huddling into his costume-themed heavy winter coat. "I thought this stuff would all clear up when we beat the guy, though!"

Raven just gave him her trademark _you're being an idiot_ look, burrowed into an alternative fuzzy, blanket that was masquerading as her cape. "You thought all this would just… go away."

"Well, yeah!"

The team all just fixed Beast Boy with a perfect copy of the same look Raven did, committing a definite bout of copyright infringement. Beast Boy at least had enough shame to sheepishly shrug and laugh.

"Also, Rob," Cyborg cawed, motioning at the light red-with-gold-accents jacket he was sporting in comparison to the rest of the almost marshmallow-like team. Robin just looked down at the jacket, then back up at Cyborg with a confused quirk of an eyebrow, forcing him to elaborate with the aggravated question, "how are you wearing just _that?_ "

"I grew up in Gotham," he stated obviously, grin in place.

Star looked confused briefly, then it cleared. "Oh! Do you humans have subspecies? Is yours resistant to the cold?"

"Eh," Beast Boy answered making a so-so motion while snickering. "Close enough. Rob is definitely abnormal, that's for sure."

Robin levelled a flat look at the boy while simply explaining, "no, I just grew up somewhere cold, so now I'm just used to it."

"Humans are such adaptable creatures!" Starfire marvelled, breath fogging.

As Beast Boy eyed the snow, Raven gave a sigh that crystallized in the air— "let's go back to Tower. Looks like the storm won't clear up for a while."

"Let's not," Beast Boy said, suddenly determined. Cyborg gave a questioning look, because _what?_ "I've changed my mind. Maybe we can still have some fun," Beast Boy said cruelly— and just like that, there was a magnificent _splat_ as a snowball landed beautifully on Raven's cape. "Hah! Fooled ya!" Raven growled, and Beast Boy continued taunting— "you didn't even see me making it 'cuz I got you thinking I wanted to go back and—"

There was a second, much wetter and grander slap as a wave of snow lifted by shadow magic rushed Beast Boy, leaving enough room only for him to squeak and hurriedly transform into a polar bear to better withstand it.

When Beast Boy extracted himself from the snow and shook his wet, cold fur off on all the team… well. That was when the most epic battle the Titans had ever been through began, leaving them all shivering in their boots.

 **xXx**

 **(For those who don't know, Gotham is quite close to New York. It would be rather chilly. On the other hand, Jump City is supposed to be somewhere near California).**

 **Got hit with a blizzard today... and apparently, the inspiration to write!**


	12. Extreme Evisceration Dudes

**Summary:** Beast Boy and Cyborg discover a common ground.

 **Rating:** K

xXx

When the Titans began to live together, it was an awkward affair indeed.

By the time the Tower was constructed, they could be considered decent acquaintances— and, more importantly (at least in Robin's opinion) they were growing as a superhero team-machine. Still though, personal bonding was… _lacking._

Naturally, living together changed that a good deal. It was of course largely convenience (and Robin's generous offer of _free_ housing) more than anything that drew the Titans to live with one another. Only Cyborg _lived_ here; everyone else was mere visitors in Jump City, leaving them without permanent residencies. The Tower solved that problem as well as their lack of a base of contact and storage.

Though it wasn't planned, it also solved their bonding issue through good old forced contact.

The first to bond were Beast Boy and Cyborg— understandably. The two of them were the most open to begin with, and (until Starfire would shrug off her nigh violent defensiveness in favor of over the top cheerfulness) they were the most naturally social on the team.

…Of course, forced contact is a bit of a _hill._

xXx

At the base of that hill was where the pair were currently.

During this time, if Cyborg were to describe Beast Boy it might be with the words _childish_ or a mulish _annoying_. Beast Boy would've described Cyborg as maybe _stiff._ Not exactly promising for bonding, and they didn't exactly work to change that either; they weren't outright _antagonistic,_ but… _still._

Cyborg functioned as a tense creature that spent much of his time amongst his tech, fiddling and improving. Beast Boy, on the other hand, dedicated his time to… well, wasting it really. All manner of completely useless tasks— Beast Boy's favorite among them was to annoy the other Titans, not exactly improving his reputation.

And so it went.

xXx

Cyborg paused on the way to his room on hearing a familiar tune. Something nostalgic stirred, and he drew closer to the music drifting up through a dark crack in the door.

A faint electronic light glowed in typical teenage rank dimness as Cyborg eyed the dreaded room of the _pest._

After a moment of standing indecisively, curiosity won out and metal joints creaked forward.

"Oh hey!" Beast Boy cawed, eyes flicking momentarily to Cyborg before focussing back on the screen. He shrugged a bit, rolling his head to shift his headphones as his fingers twitched on the controller. "Whatcha need?" he questioned in a slightly confused.

"Is this Extreme Evisceration Dudes?!" he cawed in awe instead of answering, eyes becoming glued to the screen as well. Cyborg plopped down on Beast Boy's rankled bed, sitting next to the changeling without complaint.

"Yeah dude! You play?"

"Aw yeah I do," Cyborg said excitedly back, loosening up. "Or, did," he amended.

Beast Boy gave a little _pshaw,_ small round character spitting his enemy's character off the edge after absorbing its power. "It hasn't changed much. Wanna play after this round?"

"Do I?" Cyborg asked affirmingly, excitedly.

xXx

"There's a lot more options," Cyborg mused, controller hovering around the screen.

"Yeah," Beast Boy nodded, then in a ridiculous intonation suggesting a quote, he barked, "all are present!"

Cyborg chuckled at that, toggling through a few characters in contemplation.

"I chose my character based on my theme," Beast Boy hummed. "Power stealing's the closest thing the roster's got to shapeshifting, and it has a green skin and all. Maybe you could do that too?" Beast Boy suggested, unsubtly motioning to the handful of robotic characters on the screen.

Cyborg eyed him with a bit of a spiteful look as he selected the giant monkey. "I'll go with my original pick," he huffed defensively.

Beast Boy shrugged. "My guy may be light, but he can definitely beat yours."

"We'll see about that," Cyborg responded cockily.

xXx

When Robin heard yelling as he milled the halls of the Tower at a ridiculous hour, his immediate response was that to danger.

He slid silently through the hallway, and into the room, too keyed up to pay much attention to what the yelling was _saying_.

Cyborg and Beast Boy finished a match and were insulting each other (despite the fact both ultimately had won and lost evenly, a back-and-forth battle). It was just in time for Robin to burst forth from the door, spinning blade-like birdarangs threateningly.

Cyborg and Beast Boy dropped their controllers and screeched out in fear, grabbing each other. ...Truly, the start of a beautiful friendship.

 **xXx**

 **Coming up with an alternate name for Smash Bros was more fun than I expected it to be. I kind of want these to fit into original tone of the episodes, and I think silly parodies are part of that haha!**

 **This chapter is really just inspired by my newfound addiction to Smash. I main Lucario, haha!**


	13. Discordant

**Summary:** To say the Titans have varying taste in music is an understatement.

 **Rating:** K

xXx

Arguments over music were frustratingly common within the Tower.

It was an easy occurrence; one Titan would wander in and find the lobby too quiet and alone, and turn on some music to compensate. Others would gilter in, leading to inevitable requests for changes of genre, and thus leading to squabbles because another would dislike that change. It was _torture,_ and Robin desperately wanted to come up with a solution— so he set about working.

xXx

 _Plan 1: Playlist_

"The playlist picks Raven's songs more," Beast Boy whined. "And they're like, _an hour_ long!"

The former point held no water, but… indeed, Raven's classical music was _long._ Such was its nature, but…

Robin just rubbed his head exasperatedly. "We can just program the playlist to cut it up into movements or something," he snapped.

Beast Boy put his hands up in a little appeasement— but then opened his mouth to whinge some more. "Plus, it's like, weird! We go to your punk music to the boring classic junk, and then suddenly it's Star's weird…" Beast Boy hesitated, searching for a word, eventually settling on a spat out "stuff." He paused, considering the _combination of sounds_ Star enjoyed and certainly didn't even constitute as music. "Where does she even find it?!"

Robin shrugged helplessly, trying to rid himself of the mental audio of the 'stuff' as a play through had been summoned unwillingly into his brain at the mere mention of it.

Beast Boy had _some_ good points, however annoyingly he stated them. On top of that, Robin noticed the randomized playlist didn't assauge the feelings of annoyance— if anything, it worsened it.

But… what else…?

xXx

 _Plan 2: Schedule_

"I've come up with a sheet of who has control of the speakers at what hour— and if that person is not present, I have the _priority list_ in order to determine the next in line," Robin said, waving an expertly made spreadsheet.

"You told us," Raven pointed out, bored.

"Just in case you forgot," Robin hissed. He stared at the queue for the next hour— Beast Boy's control. A pause reigned as the other Titans examined it. "Beast Boy… why."

All repetitions of one awful song, with one decent one thrown in there.

"My control," he said slowly, devilish grin in place.

Robin could already tell this wouldn't work. The coming day and resulting snappishness proved him right.

xXx

 _Plan 3: Desperation_

Perhaps three ways of dealing with things was a short time to get the normally fairly even-tempered Robin to get to the end of his rope… but there were only so many feasible solutions to the pretty specific problem, and the Titan's general chaos revolving around _the music issue_ was aggravating to say the least.

"I almost banned music from the living room," Robin admitted to his team tiredly at breakfast, sighing. Gasps and caws followed. "Just use these from now on," he cut them off bitterly, pushing headphones on the table before whisking away with grumbles on conflict resolution.

 **xXx**

 **Yes, that was a little vague reference to the salt & pepper diner bit. **


	14. Zoo

**Summary:** The Titans go to the zoo. Yes… that's it.

 **Rating** : K

xXx

"You know what I miss?" Cyborg asked thoughtfully one day, apropos of nothing, head tipped lazily back on the couch in the Titans lounge. He got only vaguely interested glances from his fellow Titans, but continued anyways, rambling— "just, those times like when I was a little kid, and I'd just like, _go somewhere_ on my free time _._ You know, like the zoo, or the science center, or whatever."

Robin stared at Cyborg a long time, mask somehow conveying a somewhat stunned _are you stupid_ look. "Cyborg," he began, then paused as though unsure how to properly explain— Robin continued forward unsurely and slowly to inform Cyborg, "you have free time and money. You can go do something like that."

Cyborg sat up slowly, the concept of independence seeming to fully sink in with a soft, dumb, "oh." There was a beat of silence, broken by a loud caw of, "we're goin' to the zoo!"

xXx

"I can't believe we let Beast Boy choose the zoo," Cyborg gruffed.

Robin shrugged, "I'm with BB about the animal cruelty of some zoos on this one—"

He was interrupted by a loud, "in your face!" by said changeling.

"Anyways, he's not _Beast Boy_ like this," Robin enforced, tapping his civilian shades and smoothing his abnormally calm looking hair down for emphasis.

"Ugh, I don't get why we hafta' wear these," Beast Boy huffed, fiddling with the holographic ring that made his skin tone a pale, ordinary color.

In turn, Cyborg fiddled with his own and shrugged. "Do you _really_ want to deal with all the interview questions and fans?"

"Guess not," Beast Boy conceded.

"Personally, I am very excited," Starfire butted in, changing the subject. "On Tamaran we never contained and displayed our creatures in such an organized manner! They were far too dangerous and nobody desired to see them, I think. Friend Raven, are you not excited as well?"

Raven shrugged, burrowing into her sunhat and goth wear. "Sure," she ground out.

"But you agreed without us doing the pressure on you?" Starfire asked, tipping her head in question.

Raven just huffed, not dignifying that with a response. Just ahead of the two, Robin gave a small, knowing smirk at Raven's secret softness.

Starfire then bounced up to the first animal— a little _too_ much of a floaty bounce, but nobody commented— and cawed over the cuteness of the meerkats and their doe eyes.

...And then she began to tip forward into the cage.

"Star, no!" all the Titans barked in freakishly perfect sync, lunging forward to haul her back.

"Oh! Are these creatures deceptively dangerous?" she questioned innocently. "Their confines don't indicate such," she admitted, eyeing the clear plastic fence.

"They need to be left alone by us so they don't get stressed," Beast Boy said in a display of uncharacteristic intelligence. At the incredulous looks from the other Titans he squawked an offended, "what, I know a lot about animals! Don't look so…" he trailed off, simply gesturing at their faces. At their continued sarcastic looks, Beast Boy merely grumbled a, "let's just go."

xXx

"You know, I thought you'd be most excited to see a _raven,"_ Beast Boy mused, staring at the bats next to the enraptured Raven.

"We get to see ravens all the time," she deadpanned back.

"Bats are out every night," Beast Boy shot back.

"Not ones that are this big," Raven retorted calmly, watching the fruit bats stretch their huge wings and lap at the various fruits available.

Beast Boy shrugged, then turned to Robin, who was staring at a seperate bat exhibit set up to look like a large cavern with a look that could only be described as _sad nostalgia._

"Dude," Beast Boy breathed, half laughing and half concerned. "Are you OK?"

"Fine," Robin choked out.

xXx

"Star, we can't spend all day with the otters—" Cyborg gently began.

He was cut off by a ferocious, "yes we can," as said alien stared unblinkingly at the concentrated cuteness. The rest of the group were fairly mesmerized (yes, even Raven) though not nearly to the extent of Starfire— despite that, they were ready to move on… unlike Star.

Cyborg realized he needed to be tactical. "Star, we can go see the penguins! Those are very cute, too." He paused for dramatic effect. "I bet you know what those are, huh?" Cyborg tried to think of a cute but obscure animal he'd seen here— then whispered conspiratorially, "betcha don't know what a pygmy falcon* is though, huh?"

Her eyes shifted, glittering with interest.

xXx

"You know, I never pegged you as a guy who liked elephants a ton, Robin," Cyborg admitted.

"Yeah! I thought like, birds, or maybe monkeys," Beast Boy hummed.

Robin glared at the mention of the latter animal. "We are _not_ talking about that."

"I was actually just thinking about gymnastics, not that," Beast Boy giggled. "But now I'm totally thinking about that."

Robin growled.

Thankfully Starfire was there to make peace via distraction (as usual). "What magnificent creatures! And what a fun to say name," she hummed. Starfire then (badly) repeated _elephant_ to herself several times, only stopping to gasp in wonder as said animal picked a stick up with its trunk.

"It has a nose hand!" she cawed, truly awed.

That was too cute for Robin to stay mad over the mention of _the Mumbo incident._

Beast Boy was allowed to breathe easy as Robin began rambling on how much an elephant could lift with its trunk.

xXx

Raven stared at the nocturnal Aye-Aye in its lair of complete darkness, musing on the relatability of the weird animal.

"Its eyes are so big," Star whispered to her, green eyes gleaming a little in the dark. "And its finger, too!" Raven expected to hear " _it's ugly_ ," or " _it's weird,"_ following that, but instead only heard Star softly whisper, "I love it."

(Another tactical tear-Star-away was needed).

xXx

"I love these guys," Cyborg sighed, staring at the sea lion. It stared back, playfully twirling in the glass.

"So typical," Beast Boy jabbed playfully as Cyborg let the thing see his red eye— which it seemed to be interested in (alas, the holographic ring couldn't exactly get rid of a _glow_ ). "We see those guys at the Tower*!" Beast Boy huffed laughingly. "Pick something _weird!"_

"I can't help it that they're cute," Cyborg huffed. "And playful," he added, bobbing up and down, getting the sea lion to mimic him.

"Fair," Robin chirped, also amused with the sea lion's antics.

Even _Raven_ watched, for who didn't love a playful sea lion…?

And Star… well, she'd likely need _yet another_ of those strategic exits.

xXx

"The zoo is closing in five minutes," a loudspeaker announced. The Titans glanced up.

"Hey," Cyborg started slowly. "There's been no villains _all day."_ A pause. "And that was fun."

"We barely made it through, like, half the zoo, slowpokes," Beast Boy cawed, though his tone indicated that he too had fun.

"I very much enjoyed this exhibition as well, friends!" Starfire joyously sang out.

Before anything else could be said, all the communicators tucked safely in pockets buzzed loudly.

"You jinxed it, Cy," Robin joked. "Titans, go!"

 **xXx**

 ***pygmy falcons are some of the cutest birds, possibly the cutest animal. Look up "pygmy falcon size" to understand what I'm saying.**

 ***Jump City is (supposedly) in California, so they'd get a lot of sea lions.**


	15. Just Good at Gym

**Summary:** Robin has to have powers… right?

 **Rating:** K

xXx

"As a Batman and Robin fan I have to know—" Beast Boy began, but was cut through by Robin's vocal _groan_ as the fellow teen lounged on the couch, hand draped over his eyes _._ "I have to know!" he defended. "What powers do you and Batman have?"

If Robin expected this question, he may have craftily come up with something _absolutely ridiculous_ to give Beast Boy some revenge for the fanboy treatment (particularly the reverent treatment he'd given Robin in the beginning). But alas, Robin was not expecting that— and so he burst out in raucous laughter.

The other teens in the room sat up from various lounging activities, warm communal silence interrupted by noise and curiosity.

"What's so funny?" Cyborg blinked.

"Beast Boy thought I had powers," Robin huffed, recovering.

Cyborg blinked again. "You sayin' you _don't?_ "

Robin laughed again.

"Powers?" Star questioned. "What are powers?"

"Something that makes you stronger than the normal person," Raven explained.

"All people cannot do the things that you and others do?" Starfire asked, genuinely surprised.

A beat of silence. "No," Raven said, slowly— almost releasing a small snort of laughter herself at the picture of the _chaos._

"Robin is an example of an ordinary person is what is being said?" she clarified.

" _Ordinary_ is stretching it," Raven jabbed, earning a scoff from the once again recovered Robin.

"How do you do that stuff, then?!" Beast Boy cawed. "Batman, too," he added as an afterthought.

"You ever heard of gymnastics?" Robin drawled.

"That's for girls," Beast Boy stated childishly, earning him a pillow from Robin and a slow clap that said _you earned that_ from Raven.

"Seriously, you guys didn't notice the gym dedicated to _just_ gymnast equipment that I exercise in," Robin deadpanned at Cyborg and Beast Boy. "And what sort of powers would I _have?"_

"I assumed some kind of speed thing for reactions," Cyborg admitted. "You are well trained," he hummed.

"I thought super strength!" Beast Boy squawked, pulling a muscular pose.

"That would be nice," Robin hummed mock-thoughtfully with a laugh.

"What is this gymnastics?" Starfire cut in, emerging from her own thoughts revolving around deciphering the conversation (in vain).

Robin's face shifted into something both playful and proud. "Wanna see?"

 **xXx**

 **Might continue or at least semi-continue this!**


	16. Shopping Trip

**Summary** : Beast Boy, Cyborg, and Starfire go to the grocery store.

 **Rating** : G

"So wait," Beast Boy said slowly, "you mean to tell me Robin's been doing this the whole time?"

"Where did you think the food in the fridge came from?" Cyborg asked equally slowly, dumbfounded by such an absurd question.

Beast Boy vaguely waved a hand. "Magic?" He paused. "A grocery store just seems so…" the changeling trailed off, unable to find a descriptor.

"I presumed the fridge was self stocking," Starfire admitted with full confidence and willingness to admit her wrong.

Cyborg slapped a hand over his face, dragging it down. "No. And since Robin is visiting Gotham right now, it's _us_ who get to go."

"Yes! The wondrous place of food!" Starfire barked, twirling in the air. She was clearly overjoyed.

"Ugh," Beast Boy groused. "Going to Gotham would've been _much_ cooler than this. Especially wearing these stupid _normal people_ disguises," he whined. "And where's Raven?! Doesn't she have to come, too?"

Cyborg shrugged. "She said something about it being better to not leave her room at all today."

"Huh," Beast Boy gruffed. "Lame. Let's get this over with."

"Yes! Let us get over this!" Star echoed, putting a cheerful twist on the repetition.

Cyborg frowned as he lead the two to the car, and couldn't help but feel he was inviting disaster, and that there was a _reason_ Robin always did this alone.

xXx

"It is so fat!" Star observed, measuring the grocery store with her hands and making a _blop_ noise as she stretched them horizontally.

Beast Boy continued to grumble petulantly on the walk in, an opposite to Star's neverending cheer. Cyborg shoved a list with highlighted items.

"Go get these," he ordered, and Beast Boy grumbled away.

Staring at Starfire, Cyborg made a snap decision to simply split the list in halves. "Come with me, Star," he offered to the bright Tamaranean.

She just gave a whoop of delight— even for Star, Cyborg knew that was over enthusiastic for just a walk. Then he traced her gaze past him, and to… a shelf of dressings.

She zoomed over to it. "Friend Cyborg," she said reverently, clutching at mayonnaise and mustard as though she had found a mountain of treasure, "there is so many."

"Yes, Star," he sighed weakly. "Put just a few in, alright?"

"I could do the living here," Star whispered to him. "Is that what this place is for?"

"It's a food supply," Cyborg explained. "So it's not for living _in_ it."

"Though you could do the living," Starfire added, adamant.

"Yes," Cyborg relented, privately picturing living on shelved food forever with a shudder.

Next, he pushed the cart into the frozen food section, Starfire giggling over this and that on the way.

And then, the worst scenario— a lady stepped out from a booth. "Sample?" she questioned, holding small cups of some new flavor of soda out on a platter.

"Oh, yes! Thank you!" Starfire chirped, and began to chug every cup on platter voraciously.

"Sorry," Cyborg murmured, shelling out money for a liter of the junky carbonated drink, figuring it was roughly equal. "She's new here," he explained, dragging her away.

"Starfire, you can't—" he began, then was cut off by an amazed, "oh! So cold," as Star placed her hand on the glass of the freezer doors.

Cyborg rolled his eyes, then demonstratively breathed on the glass and drew a little smile. Starfire clapped, and entertained herself.

Cyborg turned, picking out frozen pizza. He turned, placing the brick hard food in the cart, and caught sight of a drawing taking up the entire freezer door made by Star.

"How did you do that much with one breath?" Cyborg asked, taking in the childishly drawn landscape with the Titan Tower.

In explanation, Starfire used an eye beam to engrave another part of the drawing. Cyborg made a noise halfway between a scream and a gasp, and it came out strangled.

"We're leaving before they kick us out," he said, shoving the cart of goods away from him as though it would keep him from punishment.

"My mustard—" Star reminded, lurching back.

"Leaving," Cy interjected shortly. "I'll get you mustard another day," he said, then glanced up at the security cameras. "Another place," he added.

xXx

"Where's your stuff?" Beast Boy asked, transforming back from donkey form after Cyborg loaded his pack mule bags into the car (apparently, Beast Boy had pretty much immediately ditched the holographic ring).

"You know, I thought _you_ would be the troublesome one," Cyborg admitted, eyeing Beast Boy.

A voice echoed from across the parking lot, the lady who held the samples tray out— "yes, those are the teens who vandalized the store!"

"You did _what?"_ Beast Boy echoed, half laughing and half jealous.

"We're leaving," Cyborg muttered, swinging in the car. "We'll pay you back! We'll bill you!" he barked across the lot— then floored it.

 **xXx**

 **Eh. Not too proud of this one, but hey. Whatever.**


End file.
